Fear Of Whales

Tales of a reluctant minister


with one comment

Monogamy refers to a form of marriage in which an individual has only one spouse at any one time. However, monogamy may also refer to the more general state of having only one mate at any one time and as such may be applied to the social behavior of some animals. In current usage monogamy often refers to having one sexual partner irrespective of marriage or reproduction.
Form Wikipedia

Of if you prefer Websters: marriage with only one person at a time (compare to “bigamy”)

So let me say this clearly, because it seems like we are very confused about something here. CHRISTIAN DATING RELATIONSHIPS SHOULD NOT BE MONOGAMOUS

Christian Marriages should be monogamous. Christian dating relationships need to be “Nonogamous”. If you are dating someone it’s vitally important that you not also be married (even if your only married to one person) or to use the looser modern use of the word, you should not have only one sexual partner. You should have zero sexual partners. in anticipation of having only one.

Nonetheless christian authors make big bucks off of telling young and restless teenagers the step by step proscription God has for their dating life and it almost always includes a heavy dose of monogamous commitment right at the beginning (or often even before the relationship starts)

This isn’t just a confusion in the christian world either. It’s often a rule on secular Dating Shows like the Bachelor that there is to be “No sex before monogamy” that sentence makes no sense. That’s like saying you are to eat no fish until they’re aquatic. By this they do not mean that the contestants should not have intercourse prior to marriage, they are saying that they should not have intercourse until you are ready to stop dating other people. (“going steady”) Of course if you currently have zero sexual partners than beginning a relationship with the first one is monogamous by default.

What this does essentially, is confuse “-Gamy” Meaning “Marriage” and by association “Sex” with another word that means “Dating” or “Flirting” but it’s vitally important that we understand that these are two very different things because if we start to thing dating is marriage  and marriage is dating then what we are going to start to see is that married people will start to “break up” and divorce rates will go sky high, and dating people will start to think they are “monogamous” and therefore sex would be okay and you’ll see lots of premarital sex.

And we wouldn’t want that to happen would we?

There is a much easier answer: No sex before monogamy, sure, but no monogamy before marriage, no gamy of any sort before marriage, just lots of flowers and chocolates and fun times had together until dating time is over and a new season begins (whether that be engagement or more dates with other people or singleness)


Written by RyanGaffney

June 17, 2011 at 6:35 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

One Response

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  1. It was pointed out to me that the latin prefex “nono” actually implies “nine” more strongly than it implies “none”.

    I thought that was a pretty funny mistake, and obviously not my intention!


    June 23, 2011 at 6:18 am

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